Vinnie Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 How much space is available in Europe following Brexit? 1GB Im listening to a new band on Spotify called Duvet... They're a cover band If you see a thread from me about canned meat, dont open it. Its Spam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Piracy Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Red Indian virgin Cheyenne Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 6, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 Today I had someone knock at the door asking for donations for the local swimming pool. I gave them a glass of water. I was driving through town last night and my wife says "Hey, you missed a right". So I replied, "Aww thanks, babe, MRS Right". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 6, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 If I ever have identical twin daughters, Im gonna call one of them Kate. And the other Dupli-Kate Six topless ladies sounds amazing..... Dozen tit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1950Par Posted February 6, 2020 Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 My ex girlfriend was 6 feet seven.................She jacked me in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 11, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 11, 2020 I had an argument all day about what to call a medieval soldier. It was getting late so we called it a Knight. There was a chameleon that couldnt change colour. He was diagnosed with reptile dysfunction. I fell out with my boss and quit my job at the helium factory. No one speaks to me in that tone of voice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldwiderab Posted February 11, 2020 Report Share Posted February 11, 2020 A man goes to the doctor and says Doc I'm addicted to Twitter. The Doc says sorry I don't follow you. What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish? That tasted a little funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 13, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 13, 2020 I never thought anyone could drink 2 litres of petrol or diesel. But Jerry can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teuchter Posted February 13, 2020 Report Share Posted February 13, 2020 There are a lot of Tim Vine type jokes on here - which is not a bad thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teuchter Posted February 13, 2020 Report Share Posted February 13, 2020 On 05/02/2020 at 19:12, Piracy said: Red Indian virgin Cheyenne Took a few days, but just got that now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 14, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 14, 2020 I washed my car with my son last night. He said "Dad, cant you just use a sponge?". A few years back I quit being vegan. The most effective way was cold turkey. Around the same time I was addicted to Viagra. It was the hardest time of my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 17, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2020 I love the way the Earth rotates. Really makes my day. Dont wish to brag, but I have sychic powers. For example, right now youre thinking - "Its psychic, you bawbag" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldwiderab Posted February 17, 2020 Report Share Posted February 17, 2020 My old aunts would tease me at weddings saying are you next. I soon settled that one by doing the same to them at funerals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 18, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2020 Went to the shops yesterday for eight cans of Sprite. Got home and realised I only picked seven up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vinnie Posted February 19, 2020 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2020 Ive just set up own business where I specialise in weighing tiny objects. Its a small scale operation. Bored at work yesterday so I memorized six pages of the dictionary. This morning I remember next to nothing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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