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Reasons why you're an idiot


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This is times where you've basically said or done something stupid.

 

Last night I managed to glue two of my fingers together. A hook on the bathroom door wouldn't screw in properly (the door is cheap ****e with that cardboard crap in the middle) so I was going to glue it back on. I did so, but unfortunately got some of it on my hands (stupidly I didn't wear gloves) and since the stuff was so quick acting, managed to glue my pinkie and the finger next to it together. I was able to pull them apart but had to spend ages scrubbing the stuff off of my hands. There is still some left so I'll need to give it another shot when I get home. And my finger is quite raw from the scrubbing.

 

Daft as this was, at least I've never knocked myself out by trying to kick a bottle...

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Guest The Beer Baron

I once went to kick a plastic bottle, tripped on thé kerb and ended up stumbling through a doorway knocking myself out for a few seconds.

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I once went to kick a plastic bottle, tripped on thé kerb and ended up stumbling through a doorway knocking myself out for a few seconds.

Similarly, leaving the SECC after a night at the darts, I tried to kick a paper hat lying in the tunnel that crosses the motorway, missed, slipped on the wet concrete and smashed my face into the ground. I then got up and went out for more beer and clubbing. Only when I got back to my hotel did I realise I had a huge black eye.

I also once missed the last train at Queen Street and decided to sleep in a shop doorway in my suit. Thankfully some survival instinct kicked in and I realised I need to find a hotel, so I walked to the only one in Glasgow I could remember... the one in the previous story which was about 2 miles away.

 

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Guest The Beer Baron

I once went to kick a plastic bottle, tripped on thé kerb and ended up stumbling through a doorway knocking myself out for a few seconds.

xD Whaeeeeyyyy! What an abysmal tosser you are.

 

Wish I'd seen it. Was that was the same incident that left you looking like you'd had a hiding? 

The very same. It was before we'd even started drinking, ended up telling everyone who asked (including a job interview a few days after) that it was during a rugby match. Still have the lump near my eye to this day.

 

God, too many more to mention. I haven't pretended to row a boat in the bath though.

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